Dear Kaylie Mae,
If you are reading this you have found my voice put on paper over many years. You have only started to know me, your Mama, as an adult; the friend I could have been if only I were given the chance. The life I wanted and the life I lived were two different worlds intertwined beginning many years ago. I witnessed and learned things that no one should have to see or know. I protected those I love in different ways. I protected one for life and protected another from death.
I don’t expect you to understand why I did the things I did. I did what I did out of love, deep love and protection for you and your Daddy. I truly don’t understand how it all started myself. To look back on my decisions that I made I know that my actions had to be the way they were. I had no choice. I value life, I value family more. I did what I had to do to survive in the only way I knew how.
Please understand as you read my journey, my life, that I love you and I will always love you and your Daddy. I’m sorry if my actions to protect those I love have caused you heart ache, shame or discontent. One day when you have a family of your own you will feel the joy I felt with the family I created, the family I had to protect from despair and destruction.
Love always,
Mama
